Hey nerds, it’s your favorite time of year again! We’re in the midst of listicle season but where most of you are looking back upon the year that was in “cinema” I endeavor on, hoping to pop a few future gems your way among an overall list that will most assuredly feature at least three movies from Disney. Are you intrigued? Have you already gone back and looked at last year’s list to see how totally right I was about everything? What, you didn’t like The Dark Tower?

Me either.

Black Panther – Feb 16th

Since T’Challa (Chadwick Boseman) graced us with his kingly presence in Captain America: Civil War, I’ve been incredibly hyped to delve into his backstory and the country of Wakanda. This cast is bananas, all of the marketing thus far has been stunning and add into the mix Kendrick Lamar writing an original song and captaining the overall soundtrack and boom! What’s not to love?

Annihilation – Feb 23rd

Try as she might, Natalie Portman can’t keep from dipping her foot back into the sci-fi pool. At least this time it’s coming from a place of originality and not part of a planned franchise. Annihilation is an adaptation of a book of the same name and is directed by Alex Garland of Ex Machina fame. It looks entirely fantastical and horrifying at the same time, perfect tonally for the next movie from Garland.

Gringo – March 9th

I’m a huge fan of an action-comedy romp and I’ve also come into a place in my life where I believe that I should watch almost anything Charlize Theron decides to be in. Is this trailer ridiculous? Yes. Are they attempting to catch the stoner crowd with a story that seems to only tangentially be about weed? Probz. But every now and again, it’s nice to just get in there and turn your brain off.

A Wrinkle In Time – March 9th

You got your Oprah Space Mom, your Mindy Kaling Space Mom and your Reese Witherspoon Space Mom coming straight into your eyeballs with all of the Disney polish you could ever ask for! Sure, it’s entirely possible that the intent and overall feel of the source material may be lost in the splendor and majesty of this Disney joint but I know I’m gonna see this one on the biggest screen I can. OPRAH SPACE MOM!

Ready Player One – March 30th

This is my submission for what I now consider to be the 15 Flicks Annual Sucker Punch Prestige Award; the award that’s given at the end of the year when it becomes clear which of my recommendations ends up being the worst film. I read the book and enjoyed in thoroughly in the way the people enjoy most things that prey on our nostalgia, and if memory serves, most people loved Ernest Cline’s book full-o-references. The movie looks silly but I’m sure it’ll be fun so here’s to hope!

Avengers: Infinity War – May 4th

Oh hey, check it out, Wakanda AND the Black Panther twice in one year! Even though it’s been said about every single Avenger’s movie to date, Infinity War does seem to truly be what all the previous movies have been building towards. This movie is going to be packed with all your favorite Marvel heroes and appears to be a CGI fest unlike any we may have seen before. Still, when I hear the Avenger’s fanfare at the end of this trailer, I still get chills and every single hero shot we’ll see in this movie will be nerdy awesomeness.

Solo: A Star Wars Story – May 25th

“Didn’t we just have a Star Wars movie?” are words I may never say, but I completely understand how people might feel like they’re being burn out on that lovely galaxy far, far away. However, the movies we’re receiving outside of the Saga (re: Roman Numeral) films are where I think we’re destined to see the most growth. Solo, unsurprisingly, sets out to tell the tale of a young Han Solo, galactic rapscallion and Wookie lover. Although we’re on the back end of a hectic production, I’m looking forward to revisiting the Star Wars universe again so soon!

Deadpool 2 – June 1st

Deadpool on its own, while it took them almost a decade to get a chance to bring him to the big screen, was a surefire hit once it got the greenlight. Adding a character in Cable that is next to impossible to explain to the common movie-goer to this sequel is risky, but it seems like the tonally irreverent, meta comedy of Deadpool in general will be able to navigate the narratively tricky corner they’ve painted themselves into. Ryan Reynolds and Josh Brolin playing up a buddy-cop story line does seem like comedic gold so I’m not too worried.

Ocean’s 8 – June 8th

There is an internet hive-mind head cannon that has Cate Blanchett, after meeting her end(?) in Thor: Ragnarok, coming to earth, getting seven girlfriends and robbing banks and looking fly! While I’m cool with brining the Ocean’s universe into the MCU, what’s been presented so far seems awesome. The Ocean’s movies never stuck with me, but I enjoy the style of editing and dialogue they all have used so if you mix those techniques with this fantastic cast, I think it’ll really piss off the “why do an all female version of any movie blargggg” crowd and if it does that, alongside being an enjoyable film, the world will be better for it.

The Incredibles 2 – June 15th

Although there’s no way this series can ever equal the majesty of the Super-Suit scene, I got incredibly hyped off seeing the fuzz on Mr. Incredible’s polo shirt alone! I’m sure, being a Pixar movie, The Incredibles II will find some way to damage me at a molecular emotional level, but diving back into their world is well worth the risk!

Ant-Man and the Wasp – July 6th

Ant-Man has, up until this point, been kind of a joke in the MCU. The tried and tested origin story formula was on full cruise control for Paul Rudd’s intro, and it might have been either too obscure or too safe to stick in the minds of the Marvel faithful. This time, director Peyton Reed hopes to bring the romantic-comedy genre into a superhero heist film and retain a lot of the charm the first film had in almost boring abundance.

The Happytime Murders – August 17th

You guys like the Muppets, right? And Who Framed Roger Rabbit is the type of undeniable classic we can all agree on, right? So imagine if all the Muppets were getting murdered, and one of their own was the only one who could stop the massacre! If it’s not apparent, this is obviously not for kids, but adding in Melissa McCarthy will take this from being another Sausage Fest and turn it into one of the better comedies of the year.

The Kid Who Would Be King – Sept. 28th

The first of two revisitings of iconic British literary classics in the last third of 2018, this film will be the latest in the long line of versions of the Arthurian legend. Taking place in modern times, we’ll see a young lad named Alex discover Excalibur and team up with his friends and a Patrick Stewart version of Merlin to prevent the end of the world. This may seem to bland to mention, considering that the Guy Ritchie King Arthur flopped so badly last year but Joe Cornish, who directed Attack the Block is helming this project so I’m super excited!

Bad Time at the El Royale – October 5th

If you’re not down with the only role Jeff Bridges seems to play anymore (gruff but wise redneck) then I’m not sure how well this one will play with you. However, if you’re of fan of Cabin in the Woods and dreamy Chris Hemsworth, this one might be right up your alley! Taking place in an old hotel near Lake Tahoe, we’re probably looking at a tight action packed thriller that’ll be equal parts bloody and comedic.

Holmes and Watson – November 9th

Britannia literary revival number two, Holmes and Watson is very obviously the most recent iteration of the Sherlock Holmes mythology. I’m a fan of these stories in general but what makes this one particularly interesting is that the titular roles are filled out by Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly along with actual British persons Ralph Fiennes playing Moriarty and Hugh Laurie as Mycroft Holmes. For the fans of the infantile stylings of misters Ferrell and Reilly, Holmes and Watson could be a great end to their man-babies trilogy (see: Step Brother and Talladega Nights)

Notable Omissions

  • Tomb Raider (March 16th) – Reboot, sans Angie.
  • Isle of Dogs (March 23rd)  – Latest from Wes Anderson (Hipster Movies).
  • Ralph Breaks the Internet: Wreck it Ralph 2 (November 21st) – Long title, longer production timeline.
  • Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (December 14th) – Looks beautiful but makes me nervous.

Intentional Omissions

  • The Predators (August 3rd) – Basically for the same reason I omitted Aliens: Covenant last year.
  • Venom (October 5th) – Between Spider-Man jumping into the MCU and Sony’s fixation on creating a Spider Universe that is/isn’t independent from Tom Holland, this just seems like a mistake.
  • Aquaman (December 21st) – *Insert 24hr loop of Aquaman yelling “Yeah” and “My Man”*

TBAs

  • Mute – Duncan Jones, Sci-Fi. I’m in.
  • Psychokinesis – Remember Train to Busan? The director Yeon Sang-ho is back with a dark superhero origin flick!
  • Creed II – Although Ryan Coogler isn’t in the director’s chair this time around, if the sequel can match the emotional impact of the first, this should be good.